the loneliness in me

and here we go again 

I can not deny that I miss you

but perhaps not in the same way you do 

it boils my waters and blood 

I feel it in my stomach

the tears climbs my throat

while I swallow them up

trying with my all to not let it show 

I do not want to be irrational

but I have been more emotional

than the usual

and I can see it through

it is not about you exactly, 

but the loneliness in me

that sometimes traps my heart in a choke hold