these butterflies inside are suffocating

i do not feel secure about you now

I can not see you in my dreams

awaken or asleep

my inner is full of distrust

about it all

I just do not know what to feel

or why am I crying 

all I want is the simplest thing

and I know it would be really good for you too

but it seems like we are farther from each other

as it could ever be 

one thing I never thought it would appear

in such early time

our gravities are so different right now 

a hiatus disguised as time to breathe

when it is just less of a space to be present

within yourself or me 

maybe I am being selfish

this lonesomeness you left here is eating me alive 

the certainty is that my heart can not take it anymore

I just want a ground to step on

when it comes you

I do not know what to do

or what to feel

or what to say

towards having a breach to take you away 

 I want so to hold you tight and liberate you from the pain 

even knowing I can not  

you are too inside your world, your problems

already on the way of a mental breakdown

none of it will solve and help you in anything 

you do not know the impacting you are bringing

these butterflies inside

are suffocating 

are making me ache

for that is their instinct when someone I love disappear 

they are trying to get me out of this downhill 

I am tired of understanding 

tired of having the thought of you only

I want you in words, energy, skin and bone

or nothing at all

come closer or let me go.