I loved you.

it all brought me some peace, and a lot of what I thought it was love from your part 

a week of transparency

and illusion

I knew,

since we intertwined each other, 

that I loved you

and you knew it,

because I never was so comfortable and

present with my core before 

did it worth it?

those days were the best thing that ever happened to me

but I do not know if it really worth it

the loneliness and occultation and lies and

the discover of even more lies in the aftermath

the worst is that it did not only involved me

this feeling of emptiness inside of you

dragged two people that just wanted something and someone true

nothing more

is that asking too much of you?

if it is, and probably you knew it within,

why did not you come clean? 

how could your conscience not get heavy? 

you said you need some time for yourself

so there was a hiatus

still, my intuition was screaming at me

and I forced to forget it believing it was just paranoia

from the longing, from the silence  

as my friend said: you are a coward

you made me and her love you entirely,

for this ego of yours to be fulfilled

you need professional assistance

and we are not what you think you need 

how can I believe in anything that comes from you right now?

how can I be with someone that does not the minimum

that is: be truthful?

from the beginning of the talking

to the middle of you coming from another state 

the sensations of the warmth and comprehension

 in and out you left me 

the gathering of all what was comfortable with you:

your eyes, your words, your mind, your presence, your tears, my tears when we were about to distance

the promise of being there no matter what,

 of coming back someday near,

of the continuance

from anywhere our souls could be 

from our hearts entwined

in that time I thought it was a gold time

I hope you realize some day what you did,

what you made me go through for you

what you still make her go through 

I just hope you get consciousness of yourself

but I will not be here waiting to see

I will not be here waiting for you. 

now I am inside my feelings, inside my head

thinking I deserve more than this theatrical sequel,

a bad written Mexican novel

my mental, my emotional

are shattered, scattered

and now I see it is time for me to carry on with my all

without any comma of you.