Illuminated.

i had never experienced a love
that was not broken or unreturned
only deep down in intensity of lies, cries, unrecognizing
the tiring of it all which causes me a slowly death
I can not bare one more time
if it is not meant to be, come in and tell me
I am was not made to handle things like this
if love is not in things, where is it?
people are confusing,
matter in fact they are like clouds in a haze day
beautiful, sweet cenarium
but brings some tragedy, transformation by inundation
until you can not breathe anymore
until it passes the impossible.

oh well
it can be another frustration inside lesson
still I feel within it is something different
there is no feelings transbording
like all the others
there is trust, there is caress
there is something different.

maybe I am high,
still high to feel out of emotional disturbia

oh dear
am i swallowing to envision?
to feel your embrace
to be comfortable in it, in you
without the sensation of wanting the next exit
It feels so good, like not even once before
I am just scared, by past, of this be another stumble and then it crumbles

lost in hopefulness of its emptiness, oh please, not again

He said once maybe I am not being myself
here inside within him
not once I stuttered in response back.
I was sure, I am sure
still I have questions
because of his nature, because of this nature of mine,
much times zodiac signs means nothing,
it can not predict a stir, much less an overturn

Maybe I am in paradise,
a mixing of hell and haven, freedom new born

oh life, oh heart, oh you,
boy,
make me feel safe once until death -
maybe it does not do us apart,
tear only concrete living of us,
but spiritually we carry on -
of body comes, or even the death of it all.

Who knows? In the end of this tough thought, may we be taught,

Maybe I am
Illuminated.