roughhouse

how many revolutions in the form of feelings of others and my own

a junction of a head and a heart can handle

before an eruption?

I know there is a limit until the need to pour

through tears or screams breaks in without permission

only to recognize when i am starting to get impulsive

to not end up doing something so big I will regret later

I feel fine and

at the same time 

anxiety got me like crazy today

the hunger is not on my stomach today

roughhouse within and out

going forth and back

playing with my lungs and ribs and heart and

all of me i can not foresee

a huge weight jumping upon

i feel like i could explode but i just can not 

and it is getting bigger by every second

in the middle i am already caring with everything and everyone

like i am five instead of less than one

not focusing on the littlest good things, 

not even close to focus on me

it is a full moon in the sky

feeling like three inside

my craving is to do not a thing ordinary

on the complete opposite

oh my goddess save me from myself

and I am pouring

spilling

dropping

drowing

few by few

and so immense

what do I do

before I run away so fast no one will even see

oh not a soul can understand this tsunami happening inside of me now

all i wish i could get this freed

out of here

for i am farther away from me

no need for three wishes

i just want to breathe deeply

i just want to flow