Awaken Dreams

 since I have conscience about myself,

I am idealizing some things

scenarios I can not own in real life

where everything is comfortable, safe

and my desires, fulfilled

the rush of endorphin is awesome

and there is nothing exactly wrong

at the same time it is pure, it is wild

The problem is that

sometimes it's too comfortable to get out

of what I call awaken dreams

If you are here reading my shedding for a considered period of time,

you know what I am talking about

and how these dreams are

they are my place of escape, my refuge 

when the days are harsh somehow

Some of them I intend on becoming true some day

but lacks in me the ignition

the other part is just a past time

just to feel that rush,

to be embraced by the different sensations

I adore with my very core

yes, I am addicted to it

this is the one thing I can not hide well

yes, I need counselling about it

so it can be reflected and comprehended

from the way I fell for it back then until nowadays

and how it developed over tides of time

my growing, my blossoming, my maturing 

like a coil, it is cyclic

this still happens and even if I try to stop,

the truth is I have no control over it

no one has, indeed

and all I can do is live and learn with it