living being.

how can I comprehend the other if I am in doubt with myself? it can fit in the same sense of that old question of how can I love another if I do not do it with myself? I feel I lost the connection, and maybe, only maybe, it is okay. I am not perfect, and to tell you the truth, I wish I could be who everyone appreciate of having around. the one who did no mistakes, no misjudgement. although, there is no reason to be chasing after what is not meant to be for you. It is pants four sizes smaller. And I will not lose weight just because of that clothe. it does not worth it. I am good, I just need to check somethings of the list.
I did plenty of mistakes, failures are a part of me. and some days I became them, misbelieving myself. we learn every day, and one thing I am learning with time is that I am seed and sometimes I am polen. Not everyone can get close to it. there are so many lives. do you really think you are perfect for every single one? this is no fairytale, as once said. we need to feel fine living with ourselves, being with only ourselves. as too with everyone else. It is hard, but I will learn and I will get better. I am more inclined to like the rush of the moment, oh and how. but now I am going to soothe the waters inside first to bring the possibility of a new harvest. that is what I need. a moment. even if it lasts more than I thought. the structure is affected but the beams are strong to hold. I will not bow down to old pieces of me. because now I am rest, to be growth. after all, I am a living being, am I not?