slow kind of songs just as the lately utterly me

in the last few days

I met me down under the abyss of mine 

writing and crying

crying and aching

aching and lacking

and then again, writing

and reflecting 

and barely breathing 

because I was so within myself

that I found me lost

like I was out of my usually self 

writing and raining down over all of me

writing and feeling every single feeling

taking all over me

putting on hold

leaving me to try to think without overthinking

now I am just wondering without words

staring at nowhere

sensing the rainy wind coming

from the window above my head

in the warm bed where I am lying

embracing it and the pillow

freshly awaken

listening to a slow kind of songs 

just as the lately utterly me 

today I opened my eyes in a better landscape inside

Although 

still

just floating 

in the middle of my ocean

a land to step on is closer

even so far for my stamina of now 

will leave it that way

without forcing me anything

regaining life

life that is all around

staring into the distance 

writing these early thoughts

in knowledge that moving on

begins in the mind

before the heart, before the body

because that is life

and I am starting moving on

noticing the every side world of me

inside my mind

little steps

some hour I will achieve more than now

hope and patience

oh my temperance,

breathe along with me 

come with me 

I still do not want to be entirely alone

for I am not feeling entirely in the last few days

I met me down under the abyss of mine

writing and crying

crying and aching

aching and lacking

writing and reflecting

and listening to a slow kind of songs 

just as the lately utterly me

writing and feeling it all

all at once