chaos as nature

you does not show

away from the touch

from the body

from the nights together 

and then, the paranoias in my head 

feed up on this

they want more certainties

but I know it is not a part of you 

for so many reasons 

this coldness mixed with warmth is due to a past so chaotic 

living in a core distrustful from the root 

in the midst of my emotions I get caught up 

almost a routine, also for a past like a rollercoaster

living in a core feelings full from the root 

and this is a part of me

I can get a relief 

but may I will never escape 

without ecoing as

getting myself hurt or cold as ice

or even leaving in the other a mark not so kind 

I need to get used to your peculiarities

as you to mine 

I want you so bad, yet I somehow trust

that I will not get the whole package any time soon

these voices have been too loud

I must not believe them

in this road I am moving on

sometimes stopping 

by the heavy load 

still, heading up 

trying with my all to not surrender 

to the chaos that is my nature 

maybe we are all made of 

the same yet so different chaos 

maybe we are all savage creatures

on the same yet so different jungle